A Space Shuttle uses more fuel in the first sixty seconds after liftoff than it uses over then entire orbit around the Earth. Why? Well…when a space shuttle launches, it needs to first overcome the powerful forces of gravity to reach escape velocity. But once it burns past these initial forces, momentum kicks in and then the shuttle just goes.
When you are trying to create a new habit for yourself, whether that be working out each day or waking up earlier, or making healthier food choices, the process is similar. You must first overcome the initial forces of your engrained habits and rituals…what you typically have done in the past…until your escape velocity kicks in. Whether your old habits are healthy and beneficial or not, they are familiar. They are what your brain and your body perceive as “easier”, because change is challenging.
When I first began waking up before the sun to work out, I’m not even going to pretend it was pretty…I struggled! I would have a day or two where I made it happen, but then I’d hit a wall. I was cranky. I failed…OFTEN. I would hit snooze when I hadn’t intended to. I would make excuses like, “I’ll get to it later,” or “I worked out yesterday, so I can skip today.” If I skipped too many days, I’d feel like I needed to start my whole journey over again to feel successful, and many days I felt like giving up. I thought maybe the whole early morning thing was for other people…not me.
Friend, it took me a long time and a lot of reading to figure out that this is NORMAL! In Robin Sharma’s The 5AM Club, he calls the first 22 days of installing a new habit the Destruction Phase. Every single one of these first days is a struggle, and it is SUPPOSED to feel like a form of torture! So if that’s how you’ve felt before or are feeling now as you start something new, you are probably doing everything RIGHT, and I will pass along this author’s advice to you: “When faced with a choice, always choose the one that pushes you the most, increases your growth and promotes the unfoldment of your gifts, talents and personal prowess.”
When you feel like quitting, don’t. Keep going. Continue at all costs. Persevere.
If you don’t push past this phase and destroy your old ways, you cannot replace them with new ones. We have been programmed to think that when something is hard, that something bad is happening and that we should stop. But if it wasn’t hard, it wouldn’t be so valuable. Our hardest seasons are where we experience the most growth and evolution toward the best version of ourselves.
So if you’ve found yourself saying things like, “I’m just not a morning person,” or “Exercise just isn’t for me,” know that the fact is not that you can’t change. It’s that you merely haven’t committed to changing long enough for your brain and body to work it’s magic and truly learn the new pattern of behavior. Everything you find easy today was once hard!
When you commit to change, do the following:
- Pick 1 or 2 new behaviors to change. Do not go over 2! Give your full attention to 1 or 2 behaviors at a time, so as not to risk half-assing your committiment!
- COMMIT! Like REALLY commit! It takes at least 66 days to install a new habit to the stage where it becomes automatic, so give it that long.
- Enlist support. Join an accountability group or find a buddy to do it with you, so that you can help each other through the hard parts!
What changes do you want to make in order to become healthier? Is it giving up fast food? Ending late night snacking? Waking up earlier to fit in a workout? Or even waking up earlier to enjoy a quiet cup of coffee and set your intentions for the day? Make a plan and get your mindset right before you start, and then commit! And tell me about it! I have goals too, and I’d love to be your wing girl! Let’s destroy old habits together!
